Boyzone Confirm Split Until Money Runs Out


BOYZONE fans were told to hold back their tears after an announcement that the band’s unexpected upcoming album and equally unexpected upcoming tour would be their last, as sources close to the foursome confirmed that the lads would be back ‘as soon as the wallets get light’.

Remaining Boyzone members Shane Lynch, Mikey Graham, Keith Duffy as well as back-up singer Ronan Keating took to social media earlier this week to confirm that after 25 years they would cease to function as a band, which came as a huge surprise to many who believed they had broken up at least a decade ago.

With all four members leaving to concentrate on other projects such as tire maintenance and living quietly in anonymity, hope was kindling in the hearts of the remaining Boyzone fans that the boyz would indeed be back in town, quicker than you can say ‘massive tax bill’.

“It’s going to be a long hard 18 months for Boyzone fans,” said Louis Walsh, a local music fan who should not be confused with the musical super-manager of the same name.

“But don’t worry, they’ll be back. They may be looking to ride into the sunset right now, but as soon as work dries up in the local fish processing plant, the lads will knock out another greatest hits tour. Which of course is music to their fans ears, even though most of them must be well in their forties at this stage”.

The bands upcoming “final” album is said to include a track that the lads wrote together, and 11 cover version of songs of older Boyzone hits.