Local Landlord Orders A Couple Of Dozen Cabins From Alibaba

WASTING no time at all, Waterford landlord Damien Casey went straight to Alibaba after the government announced new plans to allow garden cabins up to 45 sq.m, in what experts are calling ‘yet another desperate attempt to mask their failure to build actual housing.’

“Guaranteed to last five years? I’ll get 20 out of them,” Casey grinned, already imagining the profit margins as he prepared to cram desperate students into flimsy prefab boxes behind his already overcrowded property, much to the delight of local neighbours, who definitely didn’t want peace and quiet anyway.

The new scheme, which will definitely not be abused by opportunistic landlords, allows homeowners to house family, friends, or Airbnb guests at the bottom of the garden, offering some light relief to the 500,000+ young adults still stuck at home due to Ireland’s spiralling housing crisis.

“Don’t get me wrong, I love my 43-year-old son, his wife and four grandchildren,” said one mother browsing Woodies for sheds, “but if I can stick them in a glorified box instead of turfing him onto the streets with the other 16,000 homeless, I’m all for it.”

The Department of Housing defended the plan, assuring the public that these cabins are like the Minister for Housing himself, only temporary.

“We’re actually on target to build almost half the houses we promised by the end of the year,” said a spokesperson proudly, “which is technically not a lie.”