BREAKING: Big Tough Alpha Male Spotted Hanging Flexed Arm Out Car Window

BEACHGOERS flocking to the seaside town of Tramore have been urged to stay alert for a big, tough alpha male brazenly hanging his tanned, hairy forearm out the side of his car window, and advised to simply be wary of his overwhelming awesomeness.

Driving some kind of German-made car that seems to be lowered with shiny alloy wheels, the alpha male is reportedly circling the prom area in what appears to be a one-man public standoff, silently challenging anyone who dares to glance in his general direction.

He is thought to be accompanied by several fellow males, but due to the car’s illegally tinted windows, this cannot be confirmed.

“He’s blasting music I’ve never heard before, like he’s trying to dominate the local airwaves in a show of force,” said one eyewitness. “It’s weird – the car’s barely moving, but it’s somehow making a ridiculous amount of noise. Then again, with the volume so high, he probably can’t hear it. He might be deaf, come to think of it, I shouldn’t judge.”

Another witness speculated that the man could be of Māori descent, “because of one of those tribal tattoos” or possibly just from Dublin.

“I could see the entire arm, right up to the shoulder. He’s obviously strong, maybe handsome, and probably very wealthy – judging by the 20-year-old car,” added a clearly impressed bystander.

Adding to local anxiety, rumours have emerged of a second man driving a similar car, with a similarly flexed arm hanging from the window. Concerned residents fear that if the two alpha males were to pass each other on the prom, it could result in some kind of cosmic paradox.

“Let’s just hope the rumours aren’t true,” read a worried message in the town’s WhatsApp group. “And that this sunny day passes without incident.”

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