“Should My Testicle Be Like That? Here, Have A Feel” – Hypochondriacs Explain Why They Think They’re Dying Right Now

MUNDANE, minor and benign changes to your body can be brushed off by most people, but spare a thought for those who believe they need immediate medical intervention when their face suddenly becomes moist when it rains, which for them, means mortal, terminal illness must be consuming them whole.

In a bid to better understand hypochondriacs and create more compassion in wider society when it comes to their endless fretting, WWN asked a number of local Waterford sufferers why exactly they think they’re dying right now:

“Is it normal for your tongue to feel exactly the same way it did yesterday? I’m freaking the fuck out,” Sheena, 39, hypochondriac.

“Oh sure it just looks like dry skin now, but it’s full blown necrosis eating away at my limbs. And when my arm falls off I’m going to pick it up and hit you with it for downplaying how serious this all is” Noel, 57, hypochondriac.

“That goose bump wasn’t there a minute ago” Fiona, 27, hypochondriac.

“Got the all clear there yesterday. That’s it now. They’ve jinxed it. That cough I had is turbo mega exploding lung cancer. Look it up on Google, awful stuff,” Frank, 50, hypochondriac.

“Here, should a testicle look like this? Have a feel of it there, what’s that ball thing, I’ve two of them, that can’t be good” Ryan, 37, hypochondriac.

“I’m not saying I’m dying but I forgot to take my vitamin D pill yesterday!” Ciara, 31, hypochondriac.

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