Dublin County Council Issue €100mn Tender For Cherry Tomato Bridge Visitor Experience

AFTER recently securing World Heritage Site status from UNESCO, Dublin’s cherry tomato bridge is finally set to be given a permanent state-of-the-art visitor experience.

“It’s a living, breathing testament to Dubliners and Ireland at large, we’d be mad not to immediately commodify it with a poorly thought out project and a vastly inflated budget. The lad who designed the Pirates of The Caribbean ride in Disneyland is doing a roller coaster for us,” explained one council official.

Failte Ireland have already begun an extensive ad campaign promoting the tomato bridge to tourists around the world, pitching it as a mysterious and ancient site on par with Stonehenge.

“It’s important to preserve an iconic Irish landmark for future generations,” added the council official, of the new CTB centre.

AirBnb’s near the site have shot up in price by as much as 273% since the attraction gained attention.

In the meantime, fencing has been erected around the site on Drumcondra with the public kept away from the tomatoes. A small garda presence has enabled the preservation of a ‘tourist lane’ with a number of private buses jammed with Americans going directly to and from the Guinness Storehouse on an hourly basis.

UPDATE: It has been confirmed Paul Mescal will be the voice of a tomato in the animated tale about the tourist attraction called ‘Little Tomato Boy’.

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