Enoch Just Glad To Get Away From The Folks For Another Little Bit

TUCKING into his favourite passage of the bible in a fresh Mountjoy prison uniform, inmate regular Enoch Burke breathed a sigh of relief as the jail door closed again for what will be his third time for breaching a court order.

“Silence is golden,” the something-year-old muttered as he licked his thumb to turn the page of our Lord, relishing in his captivity and the lack of nonsensical chattering he had become so accustomed to at his family home.

The Burke, who has previously spent over 400 days in prison for refusing to obey a barring order from a school he got fired from for trying to use his fundamental Christian beliefs to ridicule a teenage transgender student, opted again to martyr himself for his cause, but more importantly give his cluttered mind a break ‘from the folks’.

“He’s become institutionalised and prefers the jail cell to living at home than being driven every morning by his dad to stand outside a school all day with his little man bag,” a prison source revealed. “Seriously, would you blame him? Imagine being stuck living with that lot. No wonder he’s back in the Joy – it’s probably the only joy he’ll ever get.”

Closing his bible before turning in for the night, Burke wondered what the good Lord meant when he said, ‘love one another as I would love you’, the conflict with his own mother’s teachings refusing to let him sleep, along with the sound of inmate 4527 masturbating in the neighbouring cell beside him.

“God, I missed this place,” he told himself, before joining in to the ungodly rhythm.