Taoiseach To Spend Day Borrowing ID From Mark Carney To Get Into High Level Davos Meetings

ATTENDING THE high profile Davos Summit but not being high profile enough to get in the rooms where the big guns are discussing how to cause further insecurity in the world, Taoiseach Micheál Martin is banking on using Canadian prime minister Mark Carney’s ID to fool the bouncers on the door.

“I’ll just say it’s an old photo to explain the difference in the hair, please. No, I’ll say the visit to a Turkey clinic didn’t take,” a sweating Micheál Martin said, after running up to Mark Carney as he existed an important behind-closed-doors meeting.

Fully aware of his low place on the totem poll after only being invited to the day two of the big shindig, Martin explained to Carney that he would get his passport back to him as soon as possible.

“Ah c’mon Mark, your grandparents are from Mayo we’re practically blood. Spit of each other,” Martin pleaded, as he began learning off Carney date of birth and other details on his passport.

Conscious of the fact he will be ridiculed and mocked by Simon Harris on his return home if he fails to get into high level meetings were the rich and political elite discuss how best to further impoverish the poor and blame immigrants for everything Martin continued his charm offensive in the hopes of nabbing a valid ID.

“It’s so unfair ‘cus like once we’ve upped our military spending even more next year I’ll be invited into these rooms anyway, it’s so stupid. Keir, Keir, Keir, did I tell you about the time someone said we look alike?” a panicked Martin said, darting off in the direction of the UK prime minister.

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