Government Had No Idea They Had To Vet Candidates For Head Of Housing Activation Office

THE GOVERNMENT has apologised for the ongoing ‘Housing Tsar’ debacle which saw Minister for Housing James Browne champion the hiring of NAMA chief exec Brendan McDonagh, who has since withdrawn his candidacy after rudimentary research revealed he was renting out a Dublin property for €10,000 a week and had used two different names in property dealings.

“Would charging €10,000 a week for a high end property conflict at all with trying to deliver huge numbers of new housing units which would ultimately reduce house prices and rent levels? Sorry, we’re new to this, some of us have only been trying to solve this since 2014,” confirmed a government spokesperson.

“When trying to solve the housing crisis we found appointing impeccable candidates of the highest calibre, with uniquely suitable skill sets for delivering housing is all well and good but what’s better is ensuring someone kept their massive renumeration when switching over from a State agency by appointing them to this new body that has no discernible powers to deliver housing,” added the spokesperson.

While the spokesperson has apologised for the debacle, they said efforts to set up a new office and hire a scapegoat to blame for missing every conceivable housing target will be redoubled in the coming months.

Elsewhere, the government announced it was advertising for a new Housing Solutions Officer at a salary of €300k a year whose only responsibility would be to type ‘how solve housing?’ Into ChatGPT every day.

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