Western Leaders Need Something Other Than Incontrovertible Evidence Before Rushing To Condemn IDF’s Execution Of Paramedics

“WOAH, woah, woah, can’t you see there’s some tariffs being announced today. Have some respect for stock prices,” Western leaders said as they solemnly pledged to look into claims paramedics and aid workers were executed and buried in shallow graves by the IDF some days ago.

“We promise we’ll look into it at some point, but we’ve more urgent matters to attend to,” confirmed German authorities during a brief break from deporting EU citizens from the country for attending anti-genocide protests in Berlin.

The UN humanitarian affairs office said 15 people made up of Palestinian Red Crescent (PRCS) paramedics and rescue workers were killed ‘one by one’ by the IDF in Tal al-Sultan, in southern Gaza on March 23rd before being placed in a mass grave.

“Yes, but what is the Red Cross? What is a ‘UN’? Are the trustworthy? What’s their agenda? We’ll have to first verify if this group is a reliable source before weighing their testimony, the shallow grave, the crushed ambulances and body bags containing the aid workers, one of whom was executed while their hands were tied behind their back,” confirmed western leaders.

Elsewhere, reports that almost every IDF platoon forces local Palestinians to act as their human shield on patrols have been labeled as ‘untrustworthy’ as they come from notorious Hamas publication Tel-Aviv based Israeli newspaper Haaretz.