Putin Quietly Exits ‘White House Team’ WhatsApp Group

NOT WANTING to draw attention to his presence in a highly secretive WhatsApp group formed by Donald Trump’s inner circle at the White House, Russian leader Vladimir Putin has made the decision to exit the group amid increased scrutiny of similar accidental invites.

“Google it there on Yandex, ‘does the group admin get a notification if I leave a WhatsApp group’,” a stressed Putin asked Kremlin staff.

“Part of me just doesn’t want anyone to get in trouble or have egg on their face, I feel for them,” explained Putin who was first added to the group after Trump’s election in 2016 where he was been a silent member.

Additionally Putin feels he will receive sufficient backlash for being that person everyone hates in the group chat; the person contributing nothing but an occasional thumbs up emoji.

“Whether it’s the ‘White House Team’, ‘Blowtorch the Constitution’, ‘US election integrity’ or ‘US Business Group For Taking Control Of Ukraine Minerals’, all the WhatsApp groups Donald’s crew have put me in, I just think it’s best to make a silent exit,” reasoned Putin, who admitted he’s going to miss having a bird’s-eye view of the lack of brains running the US.

UPDATE: Putin’s fretting and stressing was rendered null and void after one Kremlin aide pointed out the Russian leader was the actual admin of the group.

We’ve been hacked by North Korea, made it into Trump’s campaign emails, threatened with legal action by Ireland’s richest man, angered Scientology and received 6,000 complaints from the God squad after a sketch of ours aired on RTÉ. Help us to keep pissing off all the right people – buy some of our MERCH HERE to help us continue to taking the piss in these trying times.