Local Mother Disappointed By Largely Upbeat Six One News

A WATERFORD based mother has been left utterly bereft and heartbroken by a largely upbeat news bulletin which contained little to no horrific tragedies.

“Well, what was the fucking point in watching that,” shared local mother Patricia Henley upon reaching the end of the evening’s news bulletin that was notable for its lack of violence and suffering.

Growing despondent and sinking further into armchair after a report led with a regional jobs boost, Henley began experiencing something close to tragedy withdrawal symptoms.

“Okay fine, no local murder today but I’d have taken a landslide in India or somewhere but they didn’t even give me that,” a rueful Henley said, who didn’t even get to mutter one of her catch phrases during the news.

“No ‘that’s pure shocking’ or ’what is the world coming to I tell ya’ or ‘God, that’s very young altogether’,” mourned Henley, who had to rely on the local WhatsApp gossip rumour mill for her daily hit of tragedy.

Aiming criticisms at her TV, Henley became increasingly irate at the presence of an 8-year-old child who starred in a report about designing a new apparatus which helps her sibling who has minor mobility issues.

“Do any of ye know if anyone has got a cancer diagnosis?” Henley begged, writing into several local WhatsApp groups.

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