‘Supplying Weapons To Kill 50,000 People All Fine But Just Don’t Pardon Your Son,’ Biden Told

LONG DORMANT media columnists and political commentators have awoken from a year long hibernation to valiantly put on record their displeasure at the most heinous thing Joe Biden has done since taking office.

“Are we not a country of rules and laws anymore? I fear we no longer know what are values are, civil society lives and dies on the actions of its publicly elected officials,” exclaimed one columnist, holding back tears as they typed.

“Playing quarterback in the starvation, murder and ultimate genocide of Palestinians, well, that sounds suitably American to me but using the office of the President to pardon your son? Shame on you Joe, shame on you” offered another columnist.

The news of the pardon puts a desperately dark cloud over American democracy, weeks before what was supposed to be a joyously democratic and civil transference of power to rapist and felon Donald Trump.

“What sort of person would so brazenly commit such an act,” Donald Trump asked as he unveiled Jared Kushner’s dad as the Ambassador to France several years after pardoning him for his conviction for illegal campaign contributions, tax evasion, and witness tampering involving the hiring of a prostitute to seduce his brother-in-law, arranging to record a sexual encounter between the two, and sending the tape to his sister.

“Pardoned for tax evasion and lying on a gun form, and he’s walking free – makes me sick,” said Trump who didn’t pay income tax in 11 years across an 18 year period and also purchased a gun at a South Carolina gun shop which would have been illegal as he was under a federal indictment.

Journalists possessed with a unique political insight even suggest inspired by Biden, Trump could now suddenly develop an interest in using pardoning powers for allies and January 6th insurrectionists.