Warkeepers Descend On UN Peacekeepers Post

THERE REMAINS an intense air of worry and fear among Irish people as they contend with the news that one the world’s leading warkeeping forces, the IDF, have taken up residence beside an Irish UN peacekeeping post on the Israel/Lebanon border.

“There’s a bit of a chicken and the egg debate about peacekeepers; who came first, the warkeepers or peacekeepers? All I know is the warkeepers can fuck right off anytime they want,” observed one Irish person with a rudimentary understanding of how not to start World War III.

A warkeeping force, to the uninitiated, is the antithesis of the type of peacekeeping force the Irish army has been part of for over 40 years in Lebanon with 48 soldiers losing their lives during this time.

Irish soldiers serving as part of UNFIL seek to limit flashpoints, casualties and maintain an uneasy and messy peace, whereas warkeeping personnel made up of the IDF are known for their fondness for shooting and bombing aid workers, hospitals, refugees sheltering in schools and journalists among other ‘legitimate targets’.

“For a crowd that love nothing more than decrying terrorists using ‘human shields’ they’ve no fucking problem using Irish soldiers as human shields against Hezbollah do they?” added another Irish person, citing the IDF’s potential intention to goad Hezbollah into firing on the UN outpost at which the IDF has positioned itself.