New Laws Would Make It Illegal For Influencers To Approach Members Of The Public With Little Clip Mic

HEAVILY regulating the influencer Wild West that is people carrying out on-the-street Vox pops with tiny mics, the forward thinking Irish government is set to act on one of the biggest nuisances plaguing public spaces in recent years.

With hundreds of influencers descending on the streets every day and shoving minuscule clip mics into the path of a vulnerable public and asking inane questions ranging from ‘favourite colour?’ to ‘which dictator would you shag if you saw them in the queue to Coppers?’ many have felt it is long past the time of action being taken by authorities.

“Every day 1 in 3 Dubliners are asked if they split the G. These are people just trying to commute to work, get to college, grab some lunch, it’s not right,” shared head of the DAIT (Dublin Anti-Influencer Taskforce), whose organisation will have arresting powers under new guidelines.

The proposed regulations would see influencers have to formally apply for permission to carry out Vox pops at which point they will sent to an office to fill out a form, however, the office door leads directly into a holding cell which influencers will be detained in until they agree to never do an on-the-street interview again.

“It’s not just the public who suffer, such is the competition among influencers many become embroiled in violent clashes over their ‘patch’ and fight for the right to ask ‘best pint in Dublin?’ or ‘on a scale of 1 to Famine, how hungry are you and what’s the best brunch spot?’ on specific turf. Emergency services are stretched as it is without having to deal with delicate surgeries to remove a Sennheiser mic from an influencer’s hole after a member of the public finally snaps,” confirmed one concerned medic.

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