Human Ginger Gene Linked To Orangutan


ARE you a ginger? Do you or any of your family members have red hair? Well, if so, you may be related to one of the cleverest monkeys on the planet, the Orangutan.

Scientists taking part in a study of genetic make-up at Trinity College Dublin have proved this week that red haired people directly descended from Orangutans, who also have flowing, beautiful auburn hair.

“I’m just delighted for ginger people. They have been getting a lot of bad press lately, and I hope this new finding will change all that,” Dr. David Greene, lead researcher told WWN today, “when we realised the connection, it was hard to ignore the fact that gingers are known to have fiery tempers and a higher threshold for pain, much like orangutans. They’re also more sexually active than their human counterparts and many gingers are known psychopaths, or lacking a conscience or a soul”.

The shocking news was released in a four thousand page report, which was carried out over a ten year period between 2006 and 2016 at Dublin Zoo.

“To prove our findings, we integrated several red haired human subjects with a family of Orangutans, and the results were astonishing,” Dr. Greene added.

In fact, not only did the subjects warm to the Orangutans, and vice versa, they started interbreeding with each other after only a week in captivity.

“We’re just delighted to announce that one of our female apes, Lucy, is now pregnant with a hybrid, and is due to give birth in March 2017,” he concluded.

Zoo keepers have already nicknamed the new arrival Fanta Balls.