Andy Burnham Appoints Peter Mandelson As US Ambassador In First Act As PM

IN AN APPOINTMENT that few saw coming, Peter Mandelson is to sensationally return as the UK ambassador to the US with his reappointment becoming the first official act of Andy Burnham premiership, WWN can reveal.

“Continuity and consistency is important, the public need to know I’m a steady hand and that Labour won’t drastically lurch to the left on my watch,” confirmed Britain’s new PM Andy Burnham, speaking on the appointment.

Responding to journalists questions, the new PM was quick to stress that he was only focused on delivering for Britain.

“The public don’t want you lot droning on about frivolous stuff like this, they want me and my Labour Party to get on with things, they want a government that’s focused on delivering, so please just let Peter do his bit as ambassador, the public want stability and reliability and this appointment gives them this,” assured Burnham.

Meanwhile, the UK press has politely declined the opportunity to make headlines from the news that the UK’s Covid inquiry has found the then Tory government wasted £10bn on inadequate PPE, much of the spend going directly to Tory party donors and will instead focus on how PM Burnham eating a curry once is proof he’s an open borders maniac.