10 Backdoor Prostate Jokes You Can’t Tell Anymore Because Initial Cancer Checks Now Done Via Simple Blood Test

THE Dad Jokes Society of Ireland has voiced its frustration at life-saving innovations in how prostate cancer checks are now conducted, stating a simple PSA blood test has made some of their favourite jokes irrelevant.

“Prostate cancer checks becoming a walk in the park rather than coming with a risk of a shart – it’s the end of the road for some classic jokes. I know getting this handy test done for the first time at age 45 because of a family history of breast and prostate cancer is hassle free but it’s a disaster for our sense of humour,” confirmed the group.

Mourning jokes becoming irrelevant is certainly easier than mourning a loved one however, many men over 45 are saying tearful goodbyes to the following jokes:

“If you find a set of car keys up there let me know” is now defunct thanks to the advent of early detection via a PSA blood test.

It’s farewell to “At least buy me a drink first, doc”.

No more place for “Nurse, could you get me the elbow length gloves?”

With a simple blood test “If you hear a beeping noise at home this evening, don’t worry that’s just my watch” no longer works.

Nor does “You think your job is bad, I’ve to deal with assholes every day!”

Saying “Last time I saw this many people standing around a big hole, the local council were doing roadworks” as you’re on all fours on an examination table has been consigned to history.

Arrivederci to “What’s the worst thing to feel during a prostate exam? Two hands on your shoulders.”

Soon, people won’t even understand the classic “Where should I hang up my pants doc?” “Right next to mine”. A travesty for all involved.

“My proctologist was very happy with my prostate check results. Two thumbs up.” Won’t have the same ring.

“I didn’t shower before my prostate exam today. The Doctor told me that there may be something wrong, but he couldn’t put his finger on it.” Wordplay lost due to medical progress.

Over 45? Ask your GP for a simple PSA blood test today. For more information on Prostate Cancer visit mariekeating.ie