Man Fails To Make Most Of The Summer For 15th Summer In A Row

WHILE NOT expected to be a national or even regional record, Waterford man Fionn Power has his impressed admirers after he wasted his 15th summer in a row, WWN understands.

“Hobbies taken up, zero. Books read, zero. Health kicks started, zero. Walks or runs undertaken, zero. Sunsets seen, zero. I’ve outdone myself this time,” confirmed Power, who strolls into the autumn having overseen another summer of doing fuck all and making the most of nothing.

“If you have told me when I was 20 that 15 years later I’d still never had followed through on my threat to try out surfing, I’d have said ‘yeah that sounds like me, fuck the effort of it’,” added Power, who has resisted putting pressure on himself to do anything with the brief burst of sunshine that often comes with Irish summertime.

Power is not thought to be alone in his wasting of a perfectly good summer, however, presiding over a 15 year stretch requires a lack of dedication many couldn’t muster.

“He’s some man, the amount of camping trips we’ve invited him on, festivals, BBQs, even a drive into Cork or somewhere, anywhere, and fair play to him he always had an excuse at the ready for not bothering his hole,” explained Power’s friend, Seamus Tallon.

“I know we’re at the tail end of it now, it’s basically Christmas but I could do one of them Camino things in Spain or something, always wanted to do that. Or even join the golf club like I’m always been asked to by my brother in law,” said Power, before breaking down with laughter.

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