English Festival Wouldn’t Have Put Outspoken Political Band On Bill If They Knew They Were Going To Be Outspoken, Political

A MUSIC festival in England has held its hands up and admitted that it would never have booked The Mary Wallopers, known for their rousing politically charged songs about inequality, class and injustices, if they had known such things would make an appearance on stage, WWN can reveal.

“We’re all for songs about orange juice and cod liver oil but we draw the line at acts that bring festival goers’ attention to the world around them,” explained a hole-digger at the Victorious festival in Portsmouth,

“Similarly we’re running a full review of all acts and to avoid the risk of a repeat incident we’ll refrain from booking acts that make people feel emotions, appeal to people’s humanity, it’s just not what music festivals are for. Saying ‘kids shouldn’t be slaughtered’ is the kind of fringe statement that’s too political,” added the hole-digger.

Other festival organisers have come to the defence of Victorious, confirming the last thing ticket holders want to hear from a band they’ve paid to see play songs is more about the context of songs and what inspires them to write and perform.

“When did festivals become about the music? About the message musicians try to convey with art? We got into this to allow vendors charge €10 a pint and €20 a burger. I don’t recognise the scene anymore, it’s sad,” confirmed one organiser.

Help us to continue taking the piss in these trying times by buying yourself something nice in our shop HERE