Tabloid Reluctantly Publishes 1000th Bonnie Blue Story Of The Day

“WE HATE doing this, honestly but there’s simply no other news,” confirmed editors of leading tabloids and ragebait social media publishers as they published their 1,000th Bonnie Blue related story of the day at around 10am this morning.

An Onlyfans performer with a notorious reputation for shock tactics and self-promotion who was unheard of until the media took up a challenge to cover the activities of her every orifice 24/7, Bonnie Blue remains tabloids go-to generator of clicks online.

“Disgusting, too far, shaming her parents,” said one retired journalist of one former colleague whose job now seems to involve nothing but covering Bonnie Blue’s stunts.

A new Channel 4 documentary has provided many outlets with the excuse to post an orgy of coverage in the hope of sparking fresh moral panic over a person they give free publicity to.

“It’s vile, 1,000 stories in one day isn’t safe or healthy, society is at a crossroads. What does it say about the youth of today that newspaper editors are making those of them in the media queue up to publish countless stories about this woman,” shared one horrified media expert.

“There’s no thought for the mental health and welfare, my hand is red raw from constantly typing up stories, now my libido for sensationalist scandals about promiscuous women is nonexistent,” confirmed one of the Daily Mail’s 12 Bonnie Blue correspondents.

Elsewhere, one person complaining about the ‘pornification’ of society has said it’s time for a return to more innocent days when Channel 4 just showed Eurotrash.

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