Cork Petition For Hurling Matches To Be Only 35 Minutes

RECEIVING over 500,000 signatures at some point during the second half of yesterday’s All-Ireland Hurling final, a petition circulated by Cork has called on hurling matches to last just 35 minutes.

“It’s a player welfare issue, the heat, yeah that’s it, the heat would have them on verge of sunstroke or something,” explained one of the petition signatories, their signature blurred by tears falling onto the petition.

“And like, no one thinks of the players having to get home after 5, sure the traffic is pure cat like. If they get to leave a little after 4pm, they beat the rush, it’s a human rights issue really” offered another person who believes it’s time for the GAA to look into a rule change.

“If the footballers can have fancy semi-circles and two-pointers I don’t see why the hurlers can’t have a bit of common sense, sure I’m bollocked just looking at them running around, the poor fellas. Flogged through the club and county season, when are we going to see sense,” added another member of the ‘Make Half-time Full-time Campaign’.

“It being just the 35 minutes makes sense, you end up with scores like Cork leading by 6 points, that’s reasonable, that doesn’t shame or embarrass a losing team at all, but if games went to 70 minutes who knows what margins a team could win by,” suggested another petition supporter.

Elsewhere, Mayo have confirmed they are exploring legal action over defamatory claims Cork are they Mayo of hurling with the Connacht county pointing out when they bottle a final they usually keep it to within a few points.

Help us to continue taking the piss in these trying times by buying yourself something nice in our shop HERE