Extra 45,000 Children Who Have Fallen Into Poverty Cheered Up With Gift Of Digital Clock Displaying Ireland’s GDP

STATISTICS from the Children’s Rights Alliance’s annual Child Poverty Monitor revealed that the number of Irish children in consistent poverty rose by 45,000 in just one year with the figure now at over 100,000.

The report has led to the government springing into action to remind any frustrated children that actually, to criticise the inequality present in Ireland would be wrong.

“Let the full stomach of the nation’s GDP sate your hunger. Please take these digital clock display which confirms Ireland’s GDP has risen by 22% in a year as a token of our indifference, negligence and ineptitude,” confirmed a spokesperson for the Department of GDP Is Everything.

The digital displays can be worn like a watch and emit a loud wailing sound followed by a voice broadcasting ‘you’re wrong, just look at our GDP’ from a speaker whenever a child misses a meal or can hear their parents crying in the next room over unpaid bills.

“Who needs a new pair of shoes or trousers when, from the outside looking in, the Irish economy is dressed up in the finest financial clobber,” added the spokesperson.

“You might not have access to heat during cold spells but let the fact one in five Irish households are millionaires warm you,” concluded the spokesperson.