Local Man Shocked To Make Andy Farrell’s 402,345 Man Provisional Squad For World Cup

UNAWARE he was even being considered for selection, local man Aengus Morton-Shields has been sensationally called up to Ireland coach Andy Farrell’s 402,345 man provisional World Cup squad.

Speaking from his couch, Morton-Shields knew Farrell was naming a large provisional squad and that his place in it doesn’t guarantee he will make it to the tournament in France, nevertheless, the Dublin man feels truly humbled by the call-up.

“Delighted, just over the moon. I thought it was a prank at first so I called Andy a shitebag but once he told me I really was in the initial 402,345 I was buzzing,” said Morton-Shields.

“I’d have bulked up alright in the last year, maybe he was keeping tabs on me – the calories in my Deliveroo order history certainly suggest I could do a job in the pack,” added the 30-year-old.

One of four uncapped players in the training squad that has no room for Joey Carberry, Morton-Shields admits he’s just happy to be taking part.

“Have I dreamed of coming on to replace an injured Johnny Sexton to score the winning drop goal in the final? No because any dream involving an injured Johnny is in fact a nightmare, are you mad?” confirmed the Dubliner, whose fitness regime before joining the training camp will involve his first set of sit ups in 5 years.