M50 Traffic The Leading Cause Of Mental Breakdowns In Ireland

MARRIAGE breakdown, substance abuse, being subject to Fianna Fáil and Fine Gael’s housing policies, none are as damaging to the human psyche as M50 traffic, according a study carried out by the Institute of Studies, WWN can report.

“Everyone has a tipping point and it turns out, very specfically, everyone’s tipping point is the M50,” confirmed lead researcher Dr Robert Crowley.

Analysing thousands of in-patients treated for burnout and breakdowns revealed that as many as 89% of all unraveling in Ireland occurs due to people coming into contact with rush hour M50.

“And as you may know rush hour on the M50 runs from about the stroke of midnight until the last few seconds of the day, there’s no avoiding it. That unrelenting queue of beeping and the sense you’ll never escape really does a number on people,” explained Dr Crowley.

While the government has said it is aware of the problem, it has no plans to intervene unless you count supporting increasing traffic levels on the road by getting everyone back into the office 5 days a week.

“I was earning €300,000 a year, working a 3-day week, just got married, bought our house with the pool, life couldn’t be better, happiness achieved but then I left the office a little late one evening and got caught in that traffic. Anyway, that two years ago and I haven’t been right since,” shared one participant in the study Donal Kelly told us exclusively form his straight jacket.

“I lost all my family in an avalanche on a holiday I basically guilted everyone to go on for my 60th birthday. Parent, wife, kids, grandkids, cousins, all dead. I was able to recover from that and move on with my life but 3 hours on the M50… couldn’t handle it,” added Ciaran Proctor, another study participant.

UPDATE: In a bid to counteract the psychological that is the M50, toll operators have confirmed they will be upping the price of the tolls a few more times this year.

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