Israel Records Another ‘Whoopsadaisy’ Murder Of Journalists

“ADMIT IT, when you read the news you thought it was Gaza but we’re murdering journalists in Lebanon now too. We like to keep you on your feet,” explained an IDF spokesperson, responding to the news 3 journalists were killed and 18 more were wounded in a strike on Beirut.

“Oh when I saw ‘PRESS’ I thought that was an instruction, my bad,” said the Israeli pilot responsible.

Classifying the incident as a ‘whoopsadaisy’ until conclusive proof that it was an indiscriminate strike can be presented and then completely ignored by the IDF and its enablers in the international community, the IDF said it could not comment further as it was busy committing its next war crime.

The journalists, who had given their location to UN Peacekeepers so they could inform both the IDF and Hezbollah not to engage in attacks on the location, were sleeping in shacks in southern Lebanon when hit by a missile strike.

As per IDF rules of engagement, shacks housing journalists can be referred to as ‘enemy combatants’ or ‘underground Hamas or Hezbollah tunnels’, whichever term best indicates they see themselves as accountable to no one.

Elsewhere, a ceasefire between Hamas and the Israeli government edges ever closer in an alternative dimension where Netanyahu and his far-right genocide-propagating coalition colleagues are nowhere near power.