Largest Known Occurrence Of Mass Stockholm Syndrome As Fine Gael Support Hits 27%

LEGIONS of the world’s leading psychologists, hostage negotiators and anthropologists have descended on Ireland in the hopes of observing what is believed to be the largest manifestation of mass Stockholm Syndrome.

“Once I saw that the political party responsible for record homelessness and 230,000 children living in poverty where at a three-year high of 27% in polls I got on the first flight here,” said German psychologist Heinrich Becker.

Observing public discourse and media broadcasts Becker along with peers from the world psychology spent much of the morning muttering ‘fascinating’ while making reams of notes.

Calls for the Irish public to blink out ‘help’ in morse code went unheeded.

“This upcoming election appears to be the moment the captor leaves the front door wide open but the victim can’t pluck up the bravey to run,” said one negotiator who has seen people who have spent their lives chained up in a basement less traumatised and damaged than the Irish public.

“Stockholm Syndrome? For me, Fine Gael and Simon are the only only steady hand to tackle the problems we face as a country,” said one voter of Simon Harris, the man whose party’s policies have created many of the problems that need solving.

Check out our shop. We’ve tonnes of designs to choose from with new ones added all the time. Each purchase helps us keep the lights on. Check it out here www.waterfordwhispers.shop