Article With Black And White Photo Of Elderly Couple Suggests This Going To Be Depressing As Fuck

IT’S NOT worth the risk even doing a quick scan of this article, which has had it’s surely depressing contents well-flagged by the existence of a black and white photo as the preview image displaying on the homepage.

Be it a national news outlet, a viral post, a local newspaper, it’s the same formula; if you let the headline penetrate your subconscious as it whisks by on your feed, your day is all but guaranteed to be ruined.

It’s already too late, your mind is already racing through the possibilities – rural. Tied up and robbed. Had their framed communion wafer from the Pope’s mass in Phoenix Park in 1979 stolen. Aw fuck.

And if you’re clicking in to actually read the article in full, well then, it’s your own fault. You enjoy being plunged into the depths of despair, covering yourself in it like it was the contents of a mud bath at an extortionately priced spa.

Even if it is an uplifting story of overcoming adversity, there’s a high chance that adversity includes one of the couple having a terminal diagnosis or now sharing their Eircode with a graveyard.

Fuck me, there should be a setting where you can opt of this stuff. That’s the day ruined.