Leaked Internal An Bord Pleanála Report Receives 3 Berties On Corruption Scale

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THE UNIVERSAL unit of measurement recognised by all Irish people, the BSOC or Bertie Scale of Corruption, has measured the contents of a leaked internal An Bord Pleanála report at ‘three Berties’ in severity, with the public reacting in shock as the full weight of the continuing scandal finally hitting home.

“Some still use the imperial measurement system, which puts this scandal at about 1.2 Haugheys, but I think the Bertie Scale is familiar to younger folks” one corruption expert said.

“Especially when it comes to giving evasive answers, ducking accountability and just generally being up to their necks in dodgy shenanigans,” they added of an internal report which the Minister for Housing has sat on since November and refused to make public.

The internal report, leaked by The Ditch website, shows clear instances of board members interfering with the independent work of planning inspectors and instructing them to make material changes to report which were to the benefit of property developers, in many instances insisting these requests to change be ‘off the record’.

“At three Berties, it would suggest that there’s a good chance everyone at risk of consequences will be scrambling in the background to ensure this is a case of ‘rigorous tribunal in the public interest’ rather than ‘evidence passed to Gardaí and see you in the criminal courts’,” explained one expert in accountability in Ireland.

However, the expert warned that regardless of where a scandal lands on the scale, be it 1 or 10, the results remains the same.

“Any reasonable person might call such brazen acts ‘corruption’ but what we’ve learned from the Bertie scale is that no matter where it lands on the scale it can be dismissed as ‘management failures’, ‘a misunderstanding’ or ‘corporate governance concerns’ and all involved can move on elsewhere to another cushy gig”.

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