Government Granted Planning Permission For Construction Of Ivory Tower

THE Office of Public Works has been granted planning permission for the controversial Ivory Tower structure on a site adjacent to Leinster House.

The Government, who have vocally campaigned for the tower since 2011, is said to be relieved that construction can start imminently.

An architect tasked with the construction of the Government’s Ivory Tower has sought to alleviate any worry from the public’s mind, reassuring them that the project will remain ‘tasteful’. The tower will be the first of its kind in Ireland.

“The client has come to me with a list of desires, and they feel the larger the tower, the easier it will be to dictate to people in everyday life and on their shared experience,” Andrew Connolly of Connolly Architects told WWN.

It is believed Fine Gael TD Catherine Byrne would have a key input into the tower’s construction following her recent comments on how many people avoiding water charges are simply stocking up on alcohol instead.

“While not from an architectural background we needed someone from the party to oversee the construction and making sure it all goes to plan and Catherine is knowledgeable on Ivory Towers,” the Taoiseach revealed at a brief media address earlier today.

Once construction is complete, all future cabinet meetings and policy making decisions will take place in the Ivory Tower’s highest room.

The Taoiseach cited the advantageous nature of an isolated and quiet room which would be untouched by the shouts and cries of the general public.