Radical Unreasonable Communist Unions Demand Wages That Match The Job

THE GOVERNMENT has briefed the public on the rogue actions of radical unreasonable communist unions which has led to 100,000 public and civil sector workers posing the terrifying suggestion that wages should keep up with the increased cost of living, WWN can reveal.

“They look just like regular, every day people, you might even know one of them, be married to them but make no mistake these radical communists will stop at nothing until they get 1% pay increase we agreed to and haven’t paid and can also afford their mortgage, heating bills and weekly shop. Sorry, I don’t mean to terrify you like that, but it’s the truth,” confirmed Minister for Scapegoating Jack Chambers.

“Look it’s not our fault steady middle class jobs like those available in the public service no longer provide for a basic standard of living. Wait, what? It is? Okay, let me try that again; lot of immigrants about these days, isn’t there?” added party colleague Jim O’Callaghan.

The government has stated Siptu, Fórsa and the INMO has claimed it has asked them to come to the table multiple times, but the government pointed out ‘have you seen the price of tables these days?’.

“Typical pricks, protesting for a fucking pay rise, it’s always ‘pay me more money’, never hear the fecking end of it. They wouldn’t know work if it kicked them in the hole while wearing a big ‘I’m Work’ t-shirt,” barked one private sector worker, also in desperate need of a pay increase, as he watched the news on TV.