Everything You Need To Know About Stephen Miller

STEPHEN MILLER, the White House deputy chief of staff for policy and homeland security advisor has made headlines in the last 24 hours by openly stating in an interview with CNN’s Jake Tapper that the Trump administration feels it has a divine right to take over Greenland. Here’s everything you need to know about the controversial figure:

Born August 23, 1985 in California.

Sleeps upside down and uses echolocation.

Grows ever paler with every lie told.

A rare example of childhood bullying being completely warranted.

Was treated briefly for depression after becoming chronically sad over the fact Germany lost WWII.

Jesus, if this asshole is married, what’s your excuse for being single, huh?

Voted ‘Most Likely To Try & Implement Fascism In America’ in high school.

Also voted Prom Führer.

Haunts ghosts.

Dreams of a bright American future where slavery is legal again.

In addition to English, he speaks fluent xenophobia.

Hobbies include glaring, screeching.

Asked for his name to be added to Epstein files despite not being implicated.

Only child to ever be ghosted by their own imaginary friend.

Prone to outbursts, is often held up as example of why men are too emotional to govern.

Favourite movie scene is when Bambi’s mother gets shot.

Regularly treated for allergic reaction to human flesh he is wearing.

Has pet German Shepherd named Sudetenland.

Turned self in to ICE for eating burrito once.

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