Tag: syria

Syrian Army Happy To Oblige Laughing Girl

WERE you one of the hundreds of thousands of people who were moved by the story of 3-year-old Salwa Mohammad this week, after her father Abdullah posted a viral video of her giggling with glee as missile strikes rained down close to their house? Well, you weren’t alone; the Syrian government announced today they’re going… Read more »

All Future Wars To Be Carried Out In Syria

SOME of the world’s leading organisations, including NATO and the UN, have today agreed to proxy all future wars through the middle eastern state of Syria, paving the way for countries to finalise their disagreements with minimal collateral damage in their own territories. The new ruling will allow warring nations to set up 20 military bases each across the Syrian state, with the… Read more »

Stormy Daniels Killed In Syrian Airstrike

ADULT film star Stormy Daniels has been reportedly killed last night in a US led airstrike in Syria, WWN can confirm. The controversial porn actress had apparently travelled to the middle eastern country on Thursday in what friends and family members are saying was an unusual move by the dead 39-year-old. “We have no idea… Read more »

USS Donald Cook Turns Back After Forgetting Missiles

“I’d forget my head if it wasn’t screwed on,” voiced embarrassed commanding officer of the USS Donald Cook, Matt Caldwell, while rolling his eyes and slapping his forehead in disbelief, “what are the chances?” Arriving in the Mediterranean Sea yesterday afternoon, the Arleigh Burke-class guided missile destroyer departed Larnaca, Cyprus, before making a U-turn after United States Navy… Read more »

Thousands Of Newsfeeds Affected Following Syrian Chemical Attack

A CHEMICAL attack which continues the incalculable suffering endured by innocent civilians in Syria has tragically interrupted thousands of people’s routine of mindlessly scrolling through their social media feeds, WWN understands. Penetrating newsfeeds with pinpoint precision, the chemical attack in Damascus suburb of Douma, has left thousands affected by the inconvenient realisation that the 7-year… Read more »