Tag: russia

Brexit Actually Like Carpet Bombing Own Cities, Johnson Told

IN RESPONSE to Boris Johnson controversially comparing Ukrainians fighting back against the Russia invasion of their country to Britain voting to leave the EU, people with working brains and rudimentary understanding of the world have been quick to help the British PM understand that the comparison doesn’t quite fit. “Brexit would be more like if… Read more »

China Asked Not To Do A Mussolini

CHINA is being asked to take bolstering a madman with ‘one true race’ ideation off the menu and refrain from doing ‘a complete Mussolini’, WWN has confirmed. “That guy next door may seem fun and cute and that you have lots in common, but it’ll all end in tears,” leading historians and overbearing mothers insisted,… Read more »

What Chelsea Can & Can’t Do Under Sanctions

THERE HAS been confusion and questions in the wake of the UK government sanctioning Putin pal Roman Abramovich, requisitioning Chelsea football club. How do these sanctions affect Chelsea, can they still function as a club and will this put them on the path to bankruptcy? Find out just what Chelsea FC can and can’t do… Read more »

Putin’s ‘De-Nazification’ Of Ukraine Looking A Bit Nazi

RED-FACED Red Square officials are kicking themselves after their so-called ‘de-nazification’ of Ukraine accidentally spiraled into pre-planned war crimes and further escalation which would not unreasonably invite comparisons to an actual Nazi regime with a love for inhumanity, WWN can confirm. Embarrassed Kremlin officials are now broaching difficult subjects with their leader Vladimir Putin, for… Read more »

World Asks War Shy America If It’s Feeling Okay

TESTING its forehead for signs of a temperature, the world stood back in awe of America’s newfound disinterest in direct military conflict before asking the Leaders of The Free World™ if they were feeling okay. Despite constantly falling over itself to supply tens of billions of dollars to questionable regimes with aims to decimate so-called… Read more »

Donate To Repair The Russian Embassy Gates

BY NOW everyone will be aware of the tragedy that unfolded at the entrance to the Russian Embassy in Dublin where a set of gates tragically lost its hinges. Relying on Irish people’s famous generosity the Russian Ambassador has demanded the taxpayer coughs up for repairs, a demand Irish people are happy to acquiesce to… Read more »