Tag: instant

Nearly Half a Million Irish Celebrate Double Dole Week

NEARLY five hundred thousand unemployed people in Ireland are celebrating their double dole payments this week in what is set to be the biggest pre-Christmas piss up the country has ever seen. Publicans from all around the country have reported a large increase in drink sales since yesterday afternoon and expect the boom to continue… Read more »

Man Talking On Phone Frantically Looking For Phone

 An Ennis man has admitted himself to a psychiatric ward following an incident earlier today. Tom Early, a 34-year-old electrician, was on the phone with his brother, Martin, discussing last night’s football when he realised he couldn’t find his phone. Passing it off as nothing to worry about initially, Tom decided not to trouble his… Read more »

Mandela Deaf Signer Hired As CRC Publicist

Directors of the Central Remedial Clinic (CRC) have acted swiftly in their PR battle against the wave of criticism they have received in relation to ‘top up’ payments made to some of their members. The CRC has been in the headlines ever since news broke of salaries being paid out that were in excess of… Read more »

Connacht Fans Stay Grounded Following Victory Over Toulouse

Following Connacht’s heroic 14-16 victory against European rugby giants Toulouse, supporters have vowed to keep their collective feet on the ground. Connacht supporters resisted the urge to celebrate the biggest result in the province’s history instead choosing to dissect the game over a quiet coffee. The tried and tested boot of Dan Parks and a… Read more »

Child’s Letter To Santa Full Of Veiled Threats

 The excitement and anticipation surrounding Christmas is well and truly underway in these, the first few days of December.Homes up and down the country will be kitted out with decorations and an excessively large tree in the coming days. The O’Malley household in Drogheda, Louth will be no exception. Conor O’Malley, the youngest in his… Read more »