LOCAL temporary fitness fanatic but only for the month January, Thomas Sneery, has come to the realisation that his heart just isn’t in exercising and remaining healthy for a full year. “It’d be good for my actual heart but sure look, I’ve had a good run,” explained Sneery who packed his January with 22 trips… Read more »
SEVERAL of the male patrons at a Waterford fitness centre have remarked on the overly made-up appearance of one of the gym’s female customers, adding that she dresses in a provocative manner designed solely to distract lads who just want to lift weights and make gains and take selfies. Putting aside the possibility that the as-yet-unnamed… Read more »
FEARS that over €1.7 billion of public money could be wasted or frivolously spent on the construction of the National Children’s Hospital are washed away the minute one steps onto the South Dublin site of the long-delayed project, with ample evidence on display that the taxpayer is getting the best value for every cent. With… Read more »
THE GOVERNMENT has reluctantly informed the taxpayer that the €450,000 review into the €1.1 billion overspend on the Children’s Hospital, announced only yesterday, is already €2 million over budget. Visibly grimacing as he relayed the news and shaking his head the Taoiseach, who had to fucking leave Davos for this shit, said “obviously mistakes were… Read more »
AS VEGANISM becomes a more prominent feature in the news outlets seeking to draw their readers into pointless squabbling in comment sections, WWN is maintaining its unsinkable support for decent and impartial journalism and has decided it wants some of the action too. With that, WWN has taken it upon itself to provide would-be-vegans still… Read more »
MINISTER for Health Simon Harris is today scrambling to avoid upcoming industrial action by the Nation’s 40,000-strong nursing staff, by offering the striking workforce a much-sought-after Coppers Gold Card each. The Gold Cards, which allow the bearer free entry into the 5-Star Copperface Jacks nightclub on Harcourt, are extremely rare and it is hoped that the… Read more »
CURRENTLY staring at a series of root canal treatments to save three of his ‘good back teeth’ which will cost somewhere in the region of €1,800, Waterford man Michael Cronell has said he feels ‘vindicated’ in his decision to abstain from visiting a dentist for well over ten years. Although the dental hygienist at Gums… Read more »
A WORLDWIDE study into diets and exercise routines has finally proven that starting any type of new regime on any day other than a Monday results in total and utter failure. The astounding revelation, which was discovered after a 5 year study into health fads, pointed to the start of the week as the only successful day to… Read more »
HAVING spent the run-up to Christmas filling your timelines with articles filled with wall-to-wall festive food, drinks, restaurants and treats for you to enjoy, it’s now time for us to fill your timelines with articles showing you how you can shed the pounds of disgusting fat you’ve packed onto yourself, so that you can rejoin… Read more »
WOMEN up and down the country are finding quiet, ebullient, reserved, loud, respectful, joyous, deferential and buoyant ways to mark the passing of abortion legislation through the Dáil despite ‘Pro-Life’ TDs pointing out that some people voted No in a referendum that passed with 67% (841,233) of the electorate voting to repeal the 8th amendment…. Read more »