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Number Of Drunk Idiots In A&E Falls To 250 Year Low
SCIENTISTS are investigating a possible side effect of Coronavirus infection spread after startling data from Irish A&E departments show a ... -
World Glad Rich Famous People Being Tested Before Frontline Health Workers
“THANK GOD, that’s one comfort during these sorrowful times,” exhaled the world, breathing a gargantuan sigh of relief as it ... -
WHO Confirm You Picked Wrong Year To Quit Drinking
ALTHOUGH agreeing that your declaration that 2020 was ‘your year’ was a noble one, the World Health Organisation has stated ... -
Divorce Rates Skyrocket As Couples Forced Into Self-Isolation
A SPOKESPERSON for co-habiting couples around the world has said that precautionary self-isolation action needed to stave off the spread ... -
Ireland Officially Changes Covid-19 Status From “Be Grand” To “Alright, Fair Enough”
WITH TAOISEACH Leo Varadkar confirming the need to temporarily close schools, creches and colleges along with guidelines on limiting public ... -
Local Introverts Celebrate Cancelled Events
QUIETLY whisper-shouting a celebratory ‘yes’ to themselves under their breath, the world’s introverts, along with those who suffer from varying ... -
Coronavirus Latest: Is It Time To Turn On Each Other?
HAVING endured almost an entire fortnight of dealing with the Coronavirus in a calm, measured manner, the time is upon ... -
Man Stopped At Dublin Airport Smuggling Hand Sanitiser Into Country
THE MAN has claimed he was forced into ingesting pellets carrying the valuable black market product by drug gangs who ... -
Self-Love During Self-Isolation: A Guide
AS the rest of the world continues to fret and fuss over the (admittedly frightening) advance of the Coronavirus, WWN ... -
Second Case Of Nation Completely Losing Its Shit Confirmed By Health Authorities
THE SECOND CASE of the general public ‘losing its shit’ in the Republic of Ireland has been confirmed by the ...