WITH less than 100 days to go to Christmas, Waterford dad-of-three Kenneth Albright has embarked on his usual quest to lose 14lbs of weight before December 20th, so that he can ‘enjoy himself over Christmas’ while putting every ounce back on. Albright, who never diets in the new year as he considers it ‘a bit… Read more »
PAIN on a level which allegedly makes childbirth look like a piece of piss has left local man Martin Daly in agony following an ill advised attempt to exercise for the first in years. “Can you dislocate a hamstring and tear a lung? Fuck,” said Daly, grimacing intensely as he gingerly placed himself back on… Read more »
FRIENDS and acquaintances of Dublin man Jeremy Hayes have today staged an intervention for the jogging enthusiast over his continued tirade of absolute shite talk while running, calling on him to just take the time to casually chat now and again and enjoy the moment. Hellbent on proving how fit he is by continually waffling,… Read more »
WITH more and more people walking in a bid to break up the monotonous day, the Footpath Safety Authority (FSA) has warned that instances of head-on collisions between pedestrians are spiraling out of control, with already 160 people injured so far this year. “Footpath etiquette has gone out the window and people are becoming more… Read more »
FIT people and sort-of fit people alike shared tears of joy outside the Court Of Human Rights in Strasbourg today, after a landmark ruling which outlawed the notorious ‘burpee’ exercise after decades of misery and sore arses. The court took less than ten minutes to declare the half-squat, half-plank exercise to be a gross incursion… Read more »
SINCE the covid-19 lockdown over five weeks ago, many people have discovered a whole new world of exercise with a large majority of people opting to simply put one leg in front of another, a routine commonly known as walking. Technically a simple routine for most, walking during social distancing has thrown a spanner in… Read more »
JANUARY is drawing to a close, and all your hard work, determination and early-morning effort has paid off; you’ve shed those unwanted pounds, and you’re feeling great! There’s just one problem… none of your clothes fit anymore, and with January’s paycheck earmarked for clearing the Christmas credit card, you’re in quite a pickle! You obviously… Read more »
A WORLDWIDE study into diets and exercise routines has finally proven that starting any type of new regime on any day other than a Monday results in total and utter failure. The astounding revelation, which was discovered after a 5 year study into health fads, pointed to the start of the week as the only successful day to… Read more »
WITH a new year comes a new focus and determination to get that little bit healthier and this year will prove no different for many people around the world. WWN Health is all too familiar with the mistakes people make choosing the wrong exercise regime or diet fad that just can’t sustain itself and will… Read more »
DUBLIN man Niall Kearns had thrown himself with great enthusiasm into a rigorous exercise regime for as many as 4 minutes before quitting spectacularly, WWN has learned. While there were no eyewitnesses to the 4 minutes of exercising, Niall reassured friends it had been ‘full on’ and ‘intense’, spending as much as an hour detailing… Read more »