MICHEÁL MARTIN has been presented to hospital staff at St. James’s Hospital by a number of worried members of the public after the Fianna Fáil appeared to be walking around in a confused state, with no recollection of much of the past 20 years. “Ah, you just have to act when you see someone so… Read more »
THE Government has announced a €2.7bn deal with British prefab supplier Prefabulous today in what it calls ‘The Final Solution’ to all of Ireland’s problems. In a bid to tackle everything from homelessness to the conditions experienced by Asylum Seekers, Taoiseach Enda Kenny said prefabs were the way forward in dealing with large-scale accommodation issues…. Read more »
WWN has reproduced below an unedited version of the open letter to UK prime minister has written to the people of Scotland in anticipation of the upcoming referendum this Thursday. Dear Scotland, I am writing to you to urge you to vote No this Thursday as we really are Better Together. What a lovely slogan… Read more »
LEADING light in the fading glow of intolerance and bigotry, Ian Paisley, has sadly passed away after battling an addiction to hatred aged 88. Mr Paisley united many in active opposition to his zealous desire to let hatred consume him, for much of his life he chose to become one of the most prominent hate… Read more »
MINISTER for Health Leo Varadkar is today beginning the task of picking hardened chewing gum from underneath the benches in Dáil Eireann, following an order to do so from Taoiseach Enda Kenny. The grim task, which Mr. Kenny claims is “Leo’s turn to do”, is expected to take until Monday and ruin any plans the… Read more »
IRELAND’S political class have rejoiced at the news that Irish man and former minister for the environment Phil Hogan has been named the next EU Agriculture Commissioner. However, many of members of the Irish public have confirmed a great big bollocks will in fact take the position. Hogan is set to be remembered by the… Read more »
NEWS coming out of political circles reveals that the decision by 19-year-old Brian O’Loingsigh’s to join Ógra Fianna Fáil means that in all likelihood, he is a massive special kind of prick. “You’ll first have to understand that Brian will simply not think like any normal person,” explained Colm Grainey, lecturer in Irish Politics at… Read more »
RTÉ’S autumn schedule was announced last week to much fanfare but up until now few details were known about returning dramas Love/Hate, The Fall and political drama Charlie. Charlie will centre around the life of former Taosieach Charles Haughey and the makers of the show have confirmed to WWN that the drama will contain 4,000%… Read more »
FRESH from reports that this year’s budget will not be as harsh as previous ones comes the news that the Fine Gael led coalition government have finally chosen to address the wanton waste and excess of the Celtic Tiger era with a muted remembrance in the form of a 100ft statue made entirely from diamonds,… Read more »
NEWLY appointed minister for health Leo Varadkar said today that he keeps finding “bits of breakfast rolls” around James O’Reilly’s old office and that he still hasn’t managed to get rid of the smell of farts. Mr. Varadkar first moved his stuff in last week, after a lengthy battle to have the former health minister… Read more »