Middle Aged Guy Delighted He Got The Shift Last Night

INSURANCE BROKER Cyril Murray could hardly contain his delight this morning after finally getting ‘the shift’ in The Foundry nightclub last night after a six year ‘dry spell’. The 48-year-old Dunmore man had originally intended to just go for the one after work and then make it back to his apartment in Ardkeen in time… Read more »

Father Jailed For Mullet Abuse Of Two Sons

A CORK man has been jailed for 8 years for what a judge described as one of the worst cases of mullet abuse ever dealt with by the Central Criminal Court. The victim’s mother told the court she had been aware that her son’s hair was being abused by her mullet crazed husband, but was… Read more »

Toddler Gives Not One Single Fuck About Zoo

A trip to Dublin Zoo by Waterford couple Mark and Brenda Hart and their 15 month old son Jack went ahead at the weekend, despite the child’s absolute lack of interest in anything other than scribbling and banging bits of Lego together. Showing utter disregard for his parents €170 season ticket, the young man spent… Read more »

Adult Male Wonders If Playing With His Freshly Cut Toenail Clippings After Shower Is Normal

NORMALLY functioning adult, James Hogan, wondered to himself whether playing with his toenail clippings was normal, after freshly clipping them post-shower this morning. The 34-year-old barman spent over ten minutes bending and rolling his nails while sitting on the edge of his bed, but admitted hiding the specimens from long-time partner Geraldine Holden when she… Read more »