THE Saudi underpants bomber has signed a five year contract with fashion house Calvin Klein, a spokesman for the company has revealed today. The hunky over night sensation will apparently follow in the footsteps of Mark Wahlberg and David Becham by promoting the company’s new underwear range until 2017. “He’s going to be the new poster boy of Klein” a… Read more »
THE GOVERNMENT announced today that all new water meters will include a ‘draw something’ app for the first one million lucky customers. Taoiseach Enda Kenny unveiled a prototype version of the new water measuring device this afternoon which has a circular 5 inch touch-screen display unit mounted on its head. The free gaming application will work in conjunction with the meters main goal… Read more »
THOUSANDS of mourning Irish men and women posted really funny crack ‘tribute jokes’ on Facebook today in an emotional memorial to the late Whitney Houston. The tribute jokes started pouring in seconds after the singers death late last night. The majority of which were sourced from the on-line joke website ‘Sickipedia’. Many mourners opted for… Read more »
THE Queen of England said she was ‘fucking stoked’ about her upcoming diamond jubilee celebrations, which will take place on the week-end of the 2-5 of June this year in London. The 85-year-old monarch told press today of her excitement when she arrived in King’s Lynn as she marks the 60th anniversary of her accession to… Read more »
AN anti-racism organisation, Anti-Racist Action (ARA), slammed the film industry today, claiming black actors are still being typecast for black film roles in Hollywood. A survey carried out by the ARA has revealed that black actors still feel that their skin colour does not allow them to play other races like Caucasian or Hispanic in movies. Spokesman for… Read more »
RTE have announced their decision today to replace the entire cast of Fair city with cardboard cut-outs of Kathryn Thomas as dramatic new budget cuts hit the station. Over forty cast members were given the bad news on Friday evening during a meeting called by executive producer Brigie de Courcy. Veteran of the show Jim Bartley (Bella Doyle) told WWN today… Read more »
RTE have defended their decision today to air The Late Late Toy Show from the north saying it will save the station €200k in toy costs. The dramatic move was labelled ‘pathetic’ and ‘not all that clever really’ by numerous broadcasters and licence fee enthusiasts around the country. One man told WWN: “It’s getting a… Read more »
TEENAGERS everywhere were said to be very excited today after hearing news that legendary rock star Ian Brown is to launch a ‘brand new’ indy rock band called ‘The Stone Roses‘. Thousands of young fans continued to swarm social networks this evening with the good news. Some saying this was ‘probably his best idea yet’. “Oh my… Read more »
A NEW social network called ‘Life’ has been taking the world by storm and is already tipped to become the number one platform for social interaction among friends and relatives. Launched only 3.85 billion years ago, the network has already surpassed 7.5bn members and is expected to reach 8 billion members by the end of… Read more »
CELEB extraordinaire Amanda Brunker has been confirmed today as the main headliner for the Oxegen 2011 deaf tent. WWN can exclusively reveal that the former Miss Ireland, journalist, Talent judge, socialite and general TV skivvy will rock the festivals first ever ‘deaf tent’ on Saturday afternoon. Music lovers have welcomed the news. And in even… Read more »
