A CATHOLIC priest who warned his parishioners they were putting their souls in jeopardy by taking part in yoga classes has backtracked on his earlier comments, confirming that ‘wearing Yoga pants is fine’, just as long as you’re not participating in the activity itself. The county Donegal priest, who banned advertisements for Yoga classes from… Read more »
PASSIONATE Dublin GAA fans have complained publically once again about so-called ‘sunshine’ fans in the capital city. Data collected by the Dublin Supporter’s Club (DSC) reveals that there has been a year on year increase of 10% in ‘stupid, clueless fuckers’ who only choose to support Dublin for a grand total of 1 or 2… Read more »
THE people of Ireland breathed a sigh of relief today as Minister for justice Frances Fitzgerald announced that the notorious criminal Margaretta D’Arcy is tonight behind bars, where she belongs. 80-year-old Ms. D’Arcy has been a constant threat to the safety of Irish civilians for years, following her refusal to cease protesting the landing of military… Read more »
A DEBATE as to the sexual orientation of cakes has continued to divide people in Northern Ireland with no signs of a compromise or consensus being reached. “When is a cake a gay cake?” Pondered Eamon Spillane, a rival of nearby Asher’s Baking Company, the bakery at the centre of the gay cake row. “We’ve… Read more »
WWN can exclusively report that, in an effort to save his job as Minister for Health, James Reilly has been performing a number of arduous and demeaning tasks for the Taoiseach over the course of the last few days. Eyewitness reports place Reilly in Leinster House this morning crouched down on his knees diligently washing… Read more »
THERE was said to be widespread shock in the Spanish city of Pamplona today after several humans who stood in the path of running bulls were ironically mowed down and gored by the same running bulls that they were running away from. At least 3,000 revellers took part in the annual event yesterday morning, where… Read more »
ISRAELI Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu defended airstrike’s on Palestine today, claiming its neighbour keeps staring at them and making funny faces when the rest of the world is not looking. At least 25 Palestinians have already been killed and 70 hurt in the latest hostilities, forcing the Palestinian Sunni Islamist organization to retaliate with a… Read more »
MEMBERS of the Croke Park Residents Association, who successfully opposed five consecutive Garth Brooks concerts, were yesterday musing over what other social grievances and injustices they can take on. The committee, who were said to be surprised that just taking a stand actually worked, is currently reaching out to members of fellow communities to help… Read more »
A NEW report from the Irish Mythological Association has revealed an alarming decline in Banshee sightings over the past decade. The results of the study reveal that in the years 2004-2014, there were zero reports of the dreaded spirit; a 100% decrease from the previous time frame. The Banshee, often depicted as either a beautiful… Read more »
