CONVICTED RAPIST Larry Murphy said he more than welcomes the Garda attention on John Gilligan this week, stating it takes a lot of the heat from him. Mr Murphy, who was found guilty of killing several missing women by TV3 and the Sunday world, told WWN that he may even return home for the Christmas,… Read more »
Welcome voters to my weekly column in the wonderful WWN. They say a week is a long time in politics. One hundred and sixty-eight hours if we’re getting technical. Myself and my party colleagues experienced the ecstasy of the Fine Gael national conference and the agony of the budget. Such highs, such lows and I… Read more »
A COUNTY Waterford man discovered an ingenious method for covering up his toilet flatulence today – turning on the sink taps. Dermot Casey, who stayed over in his girlfriends house last night, made his way to her en-suite bathroom at 9pm this morning, only to find he had to relieve his bowels while she waited-on… Read more »
Thousands of people up and down the country are ‘loving’ the details of the Government’s budget for the coming year as it is unveiled live on television. The Government have made Edward Snowden’s leaking of NSA files look like amateur hour as they have offered up almost every last adjustment to the media in the… Read more »
PENSIONERS will be offered a ‘fully funded’ euthanasia scheme in budget 2014, the government said today, in a bid to alleviate the growing number of over 70’s claiming state pensions. The scheme, which will see nearly one in every ten pensioners through to the afterlife, will be rolled out on the 1st of January next… Read more »
The Late Late Show’s ascension to the bottom of the barrel continues apace with the announcement today that Friday’s show will have some teeth as its main guest. Following on from last Friday’s excellent segment with the cat from the popular TV show Love/Hate the Late Late’s producers have booked in the teeth which departed… Read more »
It is a moment no Irish citizen will ever forget: where were you when Taoiseach Enda Kenny announced that Ireland would be leaving the international bailout program initiated by the IMF and Europe? Some citizens will say with pride ‘ye wha?’ Others wiping tears from their eyes will joyously recount ‘I was watching the X… Read more »
g FINANCE MINISTER Michael Noonan is gearing up for his favourite time of the year in Leinster house this afternoon, and he secretly can’t wait to see the look on poor peoples faces tomorrow, an anonymous source can reveal. Mr. Noonan was said to be ‘highly aroused’ upon entering the Dail this morning while clutching… Read more »
IRISH CRIMINAL John Gilligan said today he can’t wait to go home to watch the season finale of Friends later on this evening, upon his release from Port Lois prison after spending 16 years inside for drug trafficking. The 61-year-old made the comments to WWN earlier from his cell on his personal mobile phone: “I’m going to… Read more »
A SMALL band of dedicated Irish fans have made a surprising admission ahead of Ireland’s clash with Germany this evening. The handful of fans interviewed by WWN confessed to missing ex-manager Giovanni Trapattoni despite calling for his head on a regular basis. A certain section of Irish supporters live for moaning about seemingly inconsequential details… Read more »
