US & UK Sign ‘Fading Empires Making Each Other Feel Better’ Trade Deal

IN A DEAL that allowed the leaders of two fading empires fumbling their way toward irrelevancy to pose for very important pictures and make grand claims about their respective might, Donald Trump and Keir Starmer hailed a new AI investment agreement.

“Behold, we are big important countries not at risk of being dwarfed by the Gulf states, China, India and others, and by signing this magnificent deal we look like we’re doing things nations not hurtling towards disaster do,” explained the leaders, signing the ‘Fading Empires Making Each Other Feel Better’ trade pact.

“Seeing the two of us shaking hands must warm your patriotic and tribalistic hearts, look how tightly we grip each others hands, could a weak or servile leader do such a thing?” announced Starmer.

“I got to ride in a gold carriage and the funny hat men saluted me, we are more important than ever, I stayed in a castle!” confirmed Trump as he gave US businesses investing in the UK his seal of approval which he can revoke at any given minute in the event of someone saying something mean.

Meanwhile, Starmer and Trump bonded over their love of silencing dissent as they swapped stories of people being arrested for projecting pictures on a castle and TV shows being pulled from the airwaves for mild criticism.

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