“This Would Never Have Happened If I Was President” Trump Says Of Russian Air Strikes On Ukraine Which Killed 13

REFLECTING on Russia launching the largest number of airstrikes so far of its illegal invasion of Ukraine, US president Donald Trump has insisted none of this would have happened were he the current US president.

“Putin knows not to mess with me,” informed president Trump who insisted, he would secure ‘peace on day one’ if he were currently the man sitting in the Oval Office chair.

“Oh don’t worry how I’d solve it, just know that I’d have a solution straight away. Putin knows I can be a bad guy you don’t want to mess with,” added Trump.

President Trump made his remarks aboard Air Force One as he bemoaned the fact those in charge in the US are among the most misguided and mal-intentioned idiots the world has ever seen, uniquely incapable of solving bloody conflicts.

“For the administration demand a ceasefire yet again and offer no threat of sanctions, it’s just weak naive and loser behaviour. I’d like to see Putin try that on me,” concluded Trump.

Elsewhere, after re-announcing previously postponed tariffs on the EU on Friday and delaying them once again, experts have advised Trump that it’s never too late to drop Economics as a subject for the Leaving Cert and switch to foundation level maths.

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