Masterful Trump Gets Putin To Agree To Everything Putin Suggested

“I GOT HIM to agree to no concessions after he said ‘I will make no concessions’ and reject all terms of the 30-day ceasefire we agreed with Ukraine, Nobel Peace Prize here I come,” shared US president Donald Trump after his much vaunted call with Russian leader Vladimir Putin.

Trump, the peace loving visionary leader who this week bombed Yemen and supported Israel in its murder of 400 Palestinians after Benjamin Netanyahu refused to negotiate a second ceasefire, is basking in the afterglow that only comes after outsmarting someone you consider to be your peer.

“He won’t bomb energy infrastructure for 30 days which some would say is him admitting to previously doing that exact thing which is a war crime but I see it a victory for my famous negotiation skills,” added Trump, already brainstorming ways to force Ukraine into agreeing to Russia’s ever expanding demands.

“And how did we strong arm Vlad into this? By stopping all US offensive and defensive cyber warfare measures against Russia and lifting sanctions on Russia and then looking him dead in the eyes and saying ‘anything else you need buddy?'” chimed in JD Vance, beaming with pride at being one step closer to carving up Ukraine.

Elsewhere, sources within the Kremlin say Putin is actually extremely frustrated by the pace of progress the recent phone call represents.

“Vladimir has 500,000 ruble bet with Xi that Trump will gift him Alaska by the end of March,” the source explained.

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