Taliban Unveil Joe Biden Statue To Mark 3rd Anniversary Of Takeover Of Afghanistan

JOYOUS scenes were witnessed in Kabul today as the Taliban marked three years since the US pulled out of Afghanistan.

“You’ve got to celebrate and honour people while they’re still around, I hope Joe appreciates it as much as we appreciated him abandoning the Afghan people. It’s no Ballina mural but it’ll do,” confirmed Taliban supreme leader and head of inequality Hibatullah Akhundzada, unveiling the statue.

Twelth foot tall and concrete in nature, having been made by discarded foundations of girls secondary schools which are no longer in use, the statue is a testament to the critical role the US president played in the Taliban’s successful take over of Afghanistan.

Akhundzada also thanked the White House for the ample supply of military vehicles and supplies it left behind as they are coming in handy during border flashpoints with Pakistan.

“We’d love to have built a much larger statue, but no statue is big enough to truly express how grateful we are. Without Joe, we couldn’t have reintroduced stoning women to death, or forge stronger economic links with China,” Akhundzada added.

Asked if he feared a change in US policy in the event of a Kamala Harris victory and the risk it could pose to Taliban rule and a return to equality for women, Akhundzada responded “I’m about as worried as Benjamin Netanyahu is about US military aid drying up”.