National Day Of Mourning Sees Australia Feast On Succulent Chinese Meals

WITH TEARS in their eyes but democracy, manifest in nature, in their hearts Australians everywhere savoured a succulent Chinese meal as they paid tribute to Jack Karlson, the source of one of the finest memes the nation has given to the world.

“He who is immortalised in meme format can never truly die,” said sobbing Aussies, as they ate their meals in tribute.

Chinese restaurants have reported a huge demand for bookings with queues around the block, while police officers have been overwhelmed with people shouting ‘get your hands off my penis’ as Australians struggle to find ways to respectfully mourn the passing of Karlson, aged 82.

“Earlier, I tried to say ‘nice headlock sir, oh, ah yes, I see that you know your judo well’ but I couldn’t get the words out, I was that devastated, blubbering like a fool” said Queensland native, Clive Hill, who has uttered the Democracy Manifest speech in full close to 5,000 times since he first laid eyes on the viral video.

Karlson, who spent much of his life in institutions, homes and prison, will be remembered in a serious of events including all Australian flags flying at half mast and a staging of Hamlet in Sydney Opera House with all speaking parts replaced with lines from the famous video which resurfaced in 2009.

Closer to home in Ireland, the sad passing of Karlson has led for calls for greater recognition and appreciation of the nation’s most celebrated memes while they are alive.

“It’s times like these we really the Arts Council to get the finger out and build that 40ft The Neeeeeeck Of You statue and plan that 4-day Ah Heore Leave It Out festival,” said one somber Irish person.