The Rose Of Tralee Is A Brilliant & Modern Competition, Confirms Waterford


THE ENTIRE county of Waterford has come out in praise of the thoroughly modern, brilliant, moving and inspiring Rose of Tralee competition this morning, confirming that if anyone holds a contrary opinion they’re just sore losers.

The county has also denied that today’s pronouncements about the competition sit in stark contrast to all negative comments it had issued about the Rose of Tralee in any year a Rose hailing from Waterford didn’t take the crown.

“I’ve always said that it’s such a valued and tremendous thing altogether. I’d never hear a bad word said about it, whatever person or county wins, it always deserved. What a great showcase it is for Ireland,” confirmed local man Terry Dreary, who seemed to have no recollection of saying ‘turn that shite off’ to his wife when she began watching the Rose of Tralee festivities on Monday evening.

“People say its backwards, twee, misguided and even downright misogynistic but those people are up their own holes and need to get a grip. It’s an amazing, modern, diverse and progressive thing,” local woman Kelly Pound said, directly criticising her own words from last year.

Vocal critics of the Rose of Tralee maintain it is outdated and no matter what the organisers may say, it is a glorified beauty pageant which leans heavy on the paddywhackery. However, WWN can confirm it has been conclusively proven by science that these people are just ‘moany, bitter bollocks’ that just aren’t intelligent enough to understand how brilliant it is.

In other, unrelated news 21-year-old student and Waterford Rose, Kirsten Mate Maher was crowned the 2018 Rose of Tralee last night.