4 Things More Horrific Than Being The First One To Arrive At A Party


WE here at WWN Viral were reluctant to make this list, simply owing to the fact there is nothing more horrific than arriving to a party 45 minutes late, only to find you are in fact the first one to arrive.

A cataclysm from which you wish to run as far away from as humanly possible; the indignity and awkwardness that comes with arriving into an empty party with nowhere to flee to is likely the single most horrific experience anyone can be subjected to.

However, WWN Viral has done extensive research and we believe we may have found the 5 things on this Earth that could be reasonably judged as possibly being worse than an eager party host trying to drag excruciating small talk out of you for upwards of an hour.

1) Having all your nails pulled off your fingers and toes with a rusty pliers while being repeatedly called Robert even though that’s not your name

We’re not buying this one really, this one doesn’t sound as painful as standing around your friend’s kitchen as you pray for someone else to arrive so you can stop whatever boring story you’re in the middle of.

2) Being dropped from a plane without a parachute after being told your mother has been given a print out of your internet search history

Again, is it horrific sounding? Sure. Is it as bad as being so stuck for conversation in a deathly quiet sitting room that all you can do is ask ‘that’s a nice vase, where do you get it? Ikea was it?’

3) Having your balls placed in a vice and repeatedly crushed seconds after someone you thought you loved and trusted suddenly says they don’t think Die Hard is that good a movie

A crime against all that you hold sacred? Yes. But come on, when the fuck is everyone else going to get to this fucking party, Ciara’s now showing you a video of a dog barking at his own reflection.

4) Being the first one to arrive at the party only to discover your friend has tricked you and simply wanted to harvest your organs to sell on the black market.

Yup, this is about the only one that lives up to the ‘more horrific’ label.