Situation Between Toddler And 99 Reaching Critical Point


EXPERTS have declared that the ongoing conflict between a young child and a 99, now in its third crucial minute, could break down at any second, resulting in a catastrophic situation for the parents and sibling of the infant.

Tensions first arose when Jamie Lennon, 3 3/4, took an aggressive stance while in the shops with his Mam after noticing that his older brother Liam had gotten a 99 but he hadn’t. Jamie rejected proposals that he could get a ‘wowwipop or some cripps’, digging his heels in until pressure on his mother forced her to cave and buy him a 99 too.

The situation took a grave turn when it was discovered that Jamie had more heed in playing with the iced treat than actually eating it, a scenario that was only exacerbated when the youngster was strapped into his car seat with the 99 beginning to dribble down his hand.

“Jamie probably shouldn’t have been allowed access to a 99, but he has it now and we have to deal with that,” said Damian Lennon, father of the two boys who had been waiting out in the car.

“What we need to do now is move quickly to resolve this issue, and urge Jamie to either eat his ice-cream or surrender it to me. So far, moves to take the 99 away by diplomatic measures have failed, so we could be looking at direct action by myself or my wife in order to save the car upholstery”.

In breaking news, the situation in the Toyota Avensis has escalated even further, after Jamie decided to eat the bottom of the cone rather than the ice-cream at the top. With a total meltdown now looking increasingly likely, all the family can do is pray.